I had had a migraine every day for over a week, maybe close to two - I couldn't remember any more, I just knew I hurt and I was tired. Each day I would wake up with one, I would try less dramatic medications first to get rid of it, if that didn't work, I would pullout the big guns (Imitrex). I have had migraines the majority of my life, I think since 5th grade. I have always gotten them with greater frequency than most migraine sufferers, usually about 2/3 of the days I have them (although a little more than a year ago I started taking a medication that has significantly reduced the frequency of my migaraines - thank you modern medicine.) I handle migraines fairly well having had them so long - this is a trial I can generally deal with. But at the end of a long migraine stretch like the one I was experiencing I do get tired and my tolerance dinimishes significantly. Unfortunately, at the end of this stretch my medications weren't working very effectively anymore. Saturday I had been able to dull the pain with meds, even though I had taken 2 Imitrex, but never got rid of it. Sunday I had tried taking my mom's migraine medication, Cafergott, and it didn't even dull the pain. There were going to be 50+ people coming over for our family Christmas party, I had done all I could think of to do, and I was in a lot of pain and couldn't deal with it anymore.
I then thought about how the Lord has been carrying my burden of the pain of infertility for me for so long, making it so I rarely feel it and still enjoy life. And I figured if He can do that then maybe he can just as easily carry physical pain as well. I didn't comprehend how it would work, but I figured I would give it a shot. And so I prayed, and told my Heavenly Father about my pain, and how tired I was, and that I had tried all I could do. I told Him I was grateful migraines are my trial rather than diabetes or some other physical afflication (which I am truly grateful about) but that I was ready for this migraine to be done. I told Him I knew He was able to make my burdens so light I couldn't feel it because he had done it for me already and even though I didn't comprehend how it would work for physical pain, I believed it was possible. So if he could please either take the pain away, or help me carry it, or make me stronger so I could carry it better, I would really appreciate it. I wouldn't say immediately but within the hour my migraine eased so considereably that it was hardly noticeable, just a nuisance. The next day was my first migraine free day. I have since always had threatening migraines, my head has been sore when I wake up and I know that I am on the verge of getting one, or maybe the migraine is there and I am just not feeling the full force of it. But reading the scripture again, I think the Lord answered all three of my requests:Mosiah 24:14-15:
14 And I will also ease the burdens which are put upon your shoulders, that even you cannot feel them upon your backs, even while you are in bondage; and this will I do that ye may stand as witnesses for me hereafter, and that ye may know of a surety that I, the Lord God, do visit my people in their afflictions.
15 And now it came to pass that the burdens which were laid upon Alma and his brethren were made light; yea, the Lord did strengthen them that they could bear up their burdens with ease, and they did submit cheerfully and with patience to all the will of the Lord.
I am so grateful for a loving Heavenly Father who answers prayers and an incredible older brother, Jesus Christ, who through the atonement made it possible for me to find strength and comfort and release through pain when I need it!
4 comments:
That sounds like such a miserable existence to have a migraine last that long. I have suffered from a-symatical migraines where I don't have the standard symptoms. And those are interesting. But I am one who has had type 1 diabetes since I was a preteen so I so understand the trials thing. What a gift of healing and a strengthening of faith you received. Praise God!!!
hey amanda- just stumbled on this through face book. I loved your post about your dad, particularly because of the 64 reasons you love your dad, I could easily take 59 (my dad is 59) word for word and apply them to my dad. I especially like the one about a great laugh! I think that will be something I will always remember and love about our dads is that if they are together and laughing, there is NO WAY to aviod laughing too. I love how their eyes bulge and that laugh comes from way down in their bellies. so great. grandpa's laugh was the same, I'm sure you remember.
ok, are we on for the 17th?
love you
julie
Hey amanda,
I have a good friend who really suffers with migrains. Last I heard she went to the ER the pain was so bad. She gets them a lot and they last a long time. I'm so frustrated that it hasn't been "fixed." Seems there HAS to be a reason. I know they've found low progesterone levels, but that's it. Grrr. You are a good attitude and you seems to really handle your migraines well.
Not have babies when you want them would be just as frustrating. I really admire that you have surrendered yourself to still have joy for yourself and OTHERS. I'm sure your friends and family can sense that from you and really are impressed that you can truly be happy for them. It's so true that life DOES NOT go as planned. Everyone has or will have major heartaches in life. So hard...but life can still be good.
Love your blogs.
Hi manda,
First off, it was so good to see you even for a short time over Christmas. Secondly, I really really feel your pain and know what you're going through with your migraines. Topamax was really helping me but I can't take it (or Immitrex or Excedrine!!) when pregnant and still can't since I'm nursing Dash. It's such a hard trial because it makes the simplest things impossible when you have a migraine. Anyway, I wanted to tell you that regarding your trials - you're such a great person and so generous and considerate of others, I know Heavenly Father will take care of you and get you through this hard time. You will be SUCH a wonderful mother when the time comes, and the time needs to come soon because your kids need to be Dashy's age : ) Anyway, jake and I have had really the hardest year of either of our lives and we're constantly hoping that we're nearing the end of these extreme trials but we just have to have faith that one day these lessons we're learning will be of great value to us and others we come in contact with that we can share our experiences with.
I just want you to know how much I truly love you and cherish our friendship. You're one of my very truest friends and I count you as one of my greatest blessings. I haven't always been the BEST friend but I want you to know that now and in the future, I'll always be there for you!
love, wendy
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